6 Comments

Great post. Such truth. So complex. Memories matter. Loss tends to take up space in my physical body until I find the grace to to simply let it all work out energetically....even if that means saying goodbye. Alignment or misalignment NEVER lies. And that's just the work of this life.

Expand full comment

My bff misunderstood something I said when I was trying to process something. And she refused to talk about it or give me the benefit of the doubt. I tried. I miss having a friend. I miss the fun we had. I know I deserved someone who would have a conversation about what she felt was wrong. But it’s so hard.

Expand full comment
author

It is really hard and to my mind it is really important to take the time to grieve the loss of the relationship. Especially when it ends in such a challenging way. It’s also super hard to put ourselves out there as an adult, but I’ve learned the more I’ve done it especially the past six or seven years that so many of us feel the same way.

Meet up groups whatever it is – – we are all kind of searching for people

Expand full comment

I tend to find extroverts who eventually get annoyed that I’m not as outgoing or comfortable on large events. Or I find introverts who are like me and struggle to do more than talk online.

I do have work friends so as long as I work I have people.

Expand full comment

Excellent! Listened to it and you are spot on! I like how you broke down the topic into 4 segments. Perfect timing for me as this week I am consciously ending two long term friendships. They have become toxic and I am choosing to own my part in the toxicity and move on in love. And as you nicely pointed out, I will remember the good times and how I grew these relationships.

Expand full comment
author

And damn this shit is hard (to put it phenomenally informally :-)) Especially with the friendships you describe above: long-term.

As a woman who is very familiar with break ups and heartache🙃 this specific friendship grieving felt harder than any of those.

I wish you so much luck processing all of this.

Expand full comment