Distorted Rearview Reflections
nostalgia's polished perception of the past
Whether you listen to the VoiceOver for accessibility, because you’re more of an auditory learner or so you can grab some movement while we’re together—it will consistently be an option.
In the journey of our lives, it's tempting to fixate on the rearview mirror.
Perhaps, as the kids no longer say, that’s it. That’s the post.
We can find ourselves reflecting on past decisions/moments and getting stuck ruminating on what we would do differently if we could do it allll again now.
Heeey Daniel Pink and Regret! meets one of my fave personal growth movies, Groundhog Day, meets my marriage.
Nostalgia can also be a powerful emotional anchor.
It’s familiarity.
It’s a way to escape from the complexities and uncertainties of *today* and provides a mental retreat to a time we often perceive as simpler or easier.
Sure, ephemeral moments of nostalgia can provide comfort, remind us who we are, and even offer a bit of positive escapism from stressors of today. Yet the true path to success (however we define it) and consistency (as we have defined it) lies in embracing the present and looking firmly through the windshield at the road ahead.
I understand the nostalgia temptation (ahh the easy, breezy, lemon squeezy of selective memory).
I think we all are tempted by wistfulness at times (life transitions even when *chosen* cause us to long for the past).
Let’s resist becoming ensnared by the past and focus on the road before us.
Nostalgia is a seductive liar - G. Ball
4 Reasons why the windshield is > than the rearview:
Distorted Rearview Reflections
Nostalgia presents a polished version of the past as it blurs the rough edges and challenges we faced. When we gaze into the rearview mirror it offers us distorted perception—making past experiences and achievements (that job, that relationship, that vacation, raising tha kid…) appear more flawless than they actually were.
This idealized view misguides us and hinders our ability to learn from the past.
Paralysis by Comparison
I know.
It’s a mix of the ‘by analysis’ and ‘the thief of joy’ but hear me out.
Constantly looking back at past successes or perceived better days leads to an unhealthy comparison with our present circumstances.
The tendency to measure current achievements (I kept my resolution! Look, I’m doing yoga once a week!) against a polished past (Oh, in college I was a yoga *instructor*) often creates feelings of inadequacy. These feelings serve to demotivate us from consistent forward momentum and achieving new, current milestones.
When I owned my training studio I was one of the few trainers I knew who *didn’t* applaud the idea of putting a picture of past-You on the fridge to motivate the healthy habits of present-You.
I grasped the approach (it’s better than a celebrity photo! it’s actually you!), I firmly believed life circumstances change and what was relevant or achievable in the past might not be applicable in the present.
Nostalgic-comparing ourselves even to a past version of ourselves overlooks the context and challenges of today.
Stagnation Over Progress
Nostalgia by way of that rearview mirror can feel like a comfort zone. It lures us back into the familiarity of our pasts rather than propelling us into the seemingly scary unknown of future possibilities. Consistency in pursuing our goals demands we adapt to changing, current circumstances and are willing to get c o m f o r t a b l e in the space between what WAS and what WILL BE.
When we become fixated on ‘what worked last time’ we prevent ourselves from evolving and growing.
It's like trying to win a race by running backward – not effective.
Missed Opportunities on the Road Ahead
Remember Luck of Awareness? This is it!
Our rearview mirrors offer a limited perspective as they focus solely on we’ve done and been through.
When we dwell in nostalgia, we cannot help but miss opportunities unfolding in the present and the potential adventures waiting on the road ahead. Maintaining consistency toward our goals requires a forward-facing mindset—a mindset which sees and *seizes* opportunities that lie beyond the rear-reflection.
It's time to live life looking forward not behind, there's nothing back there worth fighting for. - unknown
And that’s it.
The not-so-secret secret to consistent success:
Keep eyes on the windshield
Flicker them back to rearview mirror-nostalgia, don’t linger
And even if you can still fit into the Laura Ashley strapless—DO NOT
Ready to join me?
Are you (to flog our poor, dead metaphor) willing to buckle up, toss that sweet sweet nostalgia in the back seat, and ride consistently together into the future looking forward?
Know someone who could use some community around consistency and encouragement with seeking and *seizing* the new? Send them this post!
I’m like a crow gazing longingly at a shiny object lately - that rear view mirror. Thanks for the perspective and nudge to shift back to the windshield.