And there’s an 18 year-old Carla back in that rearview mirror somewhere who is marveling Chicago, Asheville, Israel, Amsterdam, Pittsburgh, Nairobi… Guatemala (I can still feel that feeling!! and still laugh because I’m certain the inhabitants of the outdoor gym did not look at me and think oh my person!🙃) that the gym is my comfy space.
My first thought was the beach, and it's true that I feel authentic and calm and peaceful and happy and full when my toes are in the sand and I'm watching the endless loop of ocean waves crashing onto the beach.
My second thought was … ohhhhh, what a cliché. You CAN'T admit that the beach is the place you feel most alive.
And my third thought is, "Oh, yes, you can and you will and you must." Because it is so. Give me a beach – an ocean beach, not a lake – and I'm me.
Oh, I adore you and your monologue, because you are exactly as I am, and have come to your own conclusion to which I shall now chime in. :-)
Hell yes, it can be the beach.
As an outsider not living in your skin :-) in addition to the beauty and serenity and I can’t think of any other words I need more coffee… of the beach it also makes me think you are comfortable in your own skin.
You don’t need chaos as a distraction you’re comfortable in that skinsuit.
I wouldn't quite say I'm comfortable … you won't catch me wearing a swimsuit on that beach … but I'm almost 73, and I don't want to people-please myself into the urn. At some point, breathing and relaxing and enjoying take precedence over shoulds and musts and even wishes and hopes. What IS is what's important.
I love this soooo much. It’s taken almost 50 years to be at peace with who I am and where I am comfortable. Because it’s not like the people around me so I’ve always been told it’s wrong.
And, I know, I bring so much back to Dr. Seuss but that’s I think where I began to learn as a child it’s OK to be me, in fact, there’s just no other way to be.
And allow me to state the obvious, but it’s obvious. I’ve been thinking about a great deal recently, in so many different scenarios:
The less comfortable we are with who WE are the more loudly we tell others THEY are wrong.
My mother didn’t like her. And as you said that, she probably didn’t like herself.
She would call and tell me she didn’t understand me and that I should get help. Because she needed people around at all times and I do not.
But I get it now.
I also think I’ll handle things better in some situations. She was in a nursing home and was miserable. But just give me a few of my things and some tv for entertainment and I’ll probably be fine.
And maybe that’s the key on why so many people struggle with who they are. Because the people around them make them feel like it’s wrong to be themselves.
Just the reminder I needed this morning. No matter how untethered we might feel, there is always something/somewhere in which to anchor. Thank youuuu.
And it made me smile to include you.
And there’s an 18 year-old Carla back in that rearview mirror somewhere who is marveling Chicago, Asheville, Israel, Amsterdam, Pittsburgh, Nairobi… Guatemala (I can still feel that feeling!! and still laugh because I’m certain the inhabitants of the outdoor gym did not look at me and think oh my person!🙃) that the gym is my comfy space.
My first thought was the beach, and it's true that I feel authentic and calm and peaceful and happy and full when my toes are in the sand and I'm watching the endless loop of ocean waves crashing onto the beach.
My second thought was … ohhhhh, what a cliché. You CAN'T admit that the beach is the place you feel most alive.
And my third thought is, "Oh, yes, you can and you will and you must." Because it is so. Give me a beach – an ocean beach, not a lake – and I'm me.
Oh, I adore you and your monologue, because you are exactly as I am, and have come to your own conclusion to which I shall now chime in. :-)
Hell yes, it can be the beach.
As an outsider not living in your skin :-) in addition to the beauty and serenity and I can’t think of any other words I need more coffee… of the beach it also makes me think you are comfortable in your own skin.
You don’t need chaos as a distraction you’re comfortable in that skinsuit.
🤍
I wouldn't quite say I'm comfortable … you won't catch me wearing a swimsuit on that beach … but I'm almost 73, and I don't want to people-please myself into the urn. At some point, breathing and relaxing and enjoying take precedence over shoulds and musts and even wishes and hopes. What IS is what's important.
"The significance of these spaces lies in the consistency they bring." - that got me in the feels. Great post, Carla! :)
🤍🤍🤍
It took me until Nairobi and Israel and Guatemala to put it all together it is so much more than the movement in the gym for me.
I love this soooo much. It’s taken almost 50 years to be at peace with who I am and where I am comfortable. Because it’s not like the people around me so I’ve always been told it’s wrong.
But it’s ok to be me.
OH. THIS. MAKES. ME. SMILE.
And, I know, I bring so much back to Dr. Seuss but that’s I think where I began to learn as a child it’s OK to be me, in fact, there’s just no other way to be.
And allow me to state the obvious, but it’s obvious. I’ve been thinking about a great deal recently, in so many different scenarios:
The less comfortable we are with who WE are the more loudly we tell others THEY are wrong.
Yes.
My mother didn’t like her. And as you said that, she probably didn’t like herself.
She would call and tell me she didn’t understand me and that I should get help. Because she needed people around at all times and I do not.
But I get it now.
I also think I’ll handle things better in some situations. She was in a nursing home and was miserable. But just give me a few of my things and some tv for entertainment and I’ll probably be fine.
And you’ve captured one of my biggest lessons in life the past 10 years or so:
Meeting people where they are and who they are.
From friends, to work team members, to my daughter, even to my ex-husband – – not trying to make what I need what they should need.
Yes. Because our differences make the world work.
And maybe that’s the key on why so many people struggle with who they are. Because the people around them make them feel like it’s wrong to be themselves.