Freaky Friday

from movie magic 🪄 to life philosophy

Photo by Dollar Gill on Unsplash

"I wish we could Freaky Friday for a day!" has been my go-to phrase for as long as I can remember.

It started as a lighthearted way to acknowledge life's challenging moments days when everything feels overwhelming and Younger Carla felt convinced someone else must have it easier. The days where I was certain trading lives with literally anyone else would be a welcome relief.

As I grew older and moved into coaching and writing, the phrase took on new meaning.

I'd catch myself thinking, often mid-session with a client, how enlightening it would be if we could actually swap places for twenty-four hours. Not to understand their challenges intellectually, I got that, but to feel them viscerally. To have the opportunity to experience their daily rhythms, their decision points, their moments of doubt and triumph. What insights would I gain that even the most attentive listening could no t provide?

Recently, a friend turned the phrase back on me when he expressed a desire to ‘Freaky Friday’ into my world for a day. He shared curiosity around experiencing my brain, bod and doodle and it made me pause and wonder.

First came the internal celebration: that wonderful moment of recognition when someone else's wavelength matches your own. Then came a deeper reflection about what this movie's premise has been teaching us all along.

The fantasy of switching lives reveals not an escape from our reality, but a profound invitation to deeper understanding.

The genius of ‘Freaky Friday’ isn't just its comedic body-swapping premise, it's in how perfectly it captures our universal desire to really understand each other, and the awareness understanding requires more than observation: it demands experience.

When the mother and daughter swap places, they don't just see each other's challenges; they feel them. They discover (as we the audience do as well) that knowing about something is vastly different from knowing it from the inside out.

And here's where consistency plays an important role as it’s a part of the Freaky Friday story that's easy to miss beneath the humor and supernatural elements. The characters discover that both their and their ‘body swap’s’ successes aren't about singular moments but about sustained efforts.

The mom’s achievements come from daily dedication, not sporadic bursts of brilliance. The daughter's social navigation skills are built through consistent practice, not some innate talent or one time burst of confidence.

So, how can we capture the Freaky Friday essence without needing magic amulets?

🪄 Practice ‘day in the life’ empathy

Before judging someone's choices or reactions, mentally walk through their entire day, including all the small decisions and interactions they navigate.

Imagine their morning: the potential stress of waking up, rushing to get ready, dealing with family responsibilities, or managing unexpected challenges before they even leave home.

Consider the emotional and physical energy required to navigate workplace dynamics, personal relationships, and the countless micro-decisions that drain or energize them throughout the day.

Recognize each person carries invisible burdens, past traumas, current anxieties, health struggles, or financial pressures, that profoundly shape their responses and behaviors with us and to us in ways we might not immediately understand.

🪄 Do a ‘role switch’ exercise

Spend an hour doing someone else's routine tasks as even this brief exposure can provide surprising insights.

By intentionally stepping into another's shoes, whether our Kidult’s or a co-worker’s, we unlock empathy that goes beyond observation, creating a r e a l understanding of daily challenges and unspoken internal challenges.

The subtle stress of unfamiliar responsibilities reveals hidden complexities: a child's homework might expose intricate learning strategies, while a coworker's task might illuminate invisible organizational pressures that typically remain obscured.

This intentional perspective shift, while silly on the surface, becomes a learning experience that breaks down assumptions and builds deeper connections.

🪄 Listen with your body

When someone describes their experience, notice *your* physical reactions. Are you tensing up? Relaxing? These bodily responses offer clues about unspoken aspects of their experience.

When we pay attention and gain awareness of physical sensations, when our chest tightens or we get a knot in the stomach, we gain insights into the emotion behind the words being said.

Developing these somatic listening skills moves communication from a verbal exchange into a holistic encounter.

🪄 Keep an ‘assumption journal’

Write down your assumptions about others' experiences, then actively seek evidence that might challenge these assumptions.

This practice cultivates empathy by compelling us to recognize the complex, often invisible struggles the humans around us are experiencing reminding us that everyone is fighting a battle we know nothing about.

When we jot down and then question initial judgments, we break down the automatic narratives our mind constructs about others' lives, motivations, and challenges.

With hindsight I wonder if THIS was what my Freaky Friday friend wanted to do with me?

All of life's riddles are answered in the movies. Grand Canyon

The real magic of ‘Freaky Friday’ isn't the supernatural switch, it's the reminder every life is complex, every perspective is valuable, and every person's experience is worth p a u s i n g to understand.

No, we might not be able to magically swap places with each other (boo!) but we can choose to approach one another with curiosity, sustained attention, and the willingness to step outside our own experience.

The real transformation is not in becoming someone else for a day, muscles, brain, goldendoodle and all, but in becoming a more understanding version of our CURRENT selves.

Especially right now.